The Four Faces of Empathy: Understanding and Cultivating Different Types of Empathy

Mindful Engineer
5 min readJan 2, 2023

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Empathy is the ability to understand and share another person’s feelings. It is an essential component of healthy relationships and allows us to connect meaningfully with others. But did you know there are various types of empathy? Understanding and cultivating these various types of empathy can help us to be more understanding and compassionate toward others and ourselves.

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Figure 1 Make People Feel Loved | Source: Unsplash @ Clay Banks

Introduction

I recall the first time I felt empathy in a profound way. I was in college, and I had a close friend who was depressed. She confided in me one day about her pain and the hopelessness that seemed to consume her. I found myself not only listening, but truly understanding the depth of her anguish as she spoke. I felt a strong compassion for her and a strong desire to support and assist her in any way I could. I felt empathy in that moment, the ability to put myself in her shoes and feel what she was feeling.

Empathy is a powerful emotion that allows us to connect with people and comprehend their experiences and points of view. It facilitates the formation of meaningful relationships and can even lead to prosocial activity such as assisting others or advocating for social justice (Davis, 1983). This post will discuss the various types of empathy and how knowing and cultivating these different types of empathy can improve our relationships and overall well-being.

Cognitive Empathy

Cognitive empathy, also known as perspective-taking, is the ability to understand and view things through the eyes of another person (Spreng, Mar, & Kim, 2009). It enables us to understand how another person would feel or think in a certain circumstance, even if we do not necessarily share those feelings or thoughts. Cognitive empathy may not always imply sharing the same emotions as the other person, but rather a comprehension of their emotional state.

A argument with a loved one is an example of cognitive empathy in action. We can understand and appreciate the other person’s point of view when we have cognitive empathy, even if we do not always agree with it. This can aid in the resolution of disagreements in a more constructive and caring manner.

Emotional Empathy

Emotional empathy, also known as affective empathy, is the ability to feel another person’s feelings as if they were our own (Jolliffe & Farrington, 2006). It is a more visceral and emotional reaction to other people’s experiences. Emotional empathy can be a powerful tool for connecting people and leading to more prosocial conduct. However, it is crucial to note that experiencing the emotions of others can be exhausting and may necessitate self-regulation to avoid burnout or distress (Gentile, 2010).

A crisis, such as a natural disaster, is an example of emotional empathy in action. It is normal to feel sadness and sympathy when we view photographs or hear stories about the devastation and suffering of others. This emotional response can inspire us to act and assist others in need.

Compassionate Empathy

Compassionate empathy combines cognitive and emotional empathy, as well as a desire to assist the person in need (Shiota, Keltner, & John, 2006). It is the ability to recognise and feel the pain of others while also doing action to alleviate that pain. Compassionate empathy is strongly tied to the concept of compassion, which is a desire to relieve others’ suffering and enhance their well-being (Goetz, Keltner, & Simon-Thomas, 2010).

Volunteering at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter is an example of compassionate empathy in action. We may use our empathy and compassion to make a difference in the world by actively seeking out methods to help those in need.

Self-Empathy

Self-empathy is the ability to recognise and acknowledge our own feelings and needs (Neff, 2003). It is an essential component of self-care and self-compassion, and it is being kind and understanding to oneself, especially during times of sorrow or struggle. Instead of condemning or discounting our own emotions and needs, self-empathy allows us to identify and validate them.

Taking a minute to pause and reflect on our own emotions and experiences during a difficult situation is an example of self-empathy in action. We can take better care of ourselves and manage with challenging emotions if we acknowledge and validate our own feelings.

Comparison

The table below compares many varieties of empathy, including their definitions and whether they entail feelings and/or assisting others.

Figure 2 Table Comparing different types of Empathy

Conclusion

To sum it all up, empathy is a complex and varied emotion characterised by the ability to comprehend and relate to the experiences and emotions of others. Empathy comes in many forms, including cognitive empathy, emotional empathy, compassionate empathy, and self-empathy. Understanding and fostering these many levels of empathy can help us enhance our relationships and our general well-being. We may build a more compassionate and understanding world by being able to see things from others’ perspectives, experience and validate others’ emotions, and take action to aid those in need.

References

Davis, M. H. (1983). Measuring individual differences in empathy: Evidence for a multidimensional approach. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 44(1), 113–126.

Gentile, B. (2010). Empathy: Its ultimate and proximate bases. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 33(1), 1–20.

Goetz, J. L., Keltner, D., & Simon-Thomas, E. (2010). Compassion: An evolutionary analysis and empirical review. Psychological Bulletin, 136(3), 351–374.

Jolliffe, D., & Farrington, D. P. (2006). Empathy and offending: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Aggression and Violent Behavior, 11(3), 191–209.

Neff, K. D. (2003). The development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion. Self and Identity, 2(3), 223–250.

Spreng, R. N., Mar, R. A., & Kim, A. S. (2009). The common neural basis of autobiographical memory, prospection, navigation, theory of mind, and the default mode: A quantitative meta-analysis. Journal of Cognitive Neuroscience, 21(3), 489–510.

Shiota, M. N., Keltner, D., & John, O. P. (2006). Positive emotion dispositions differentially associated with three facets of subjective well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 91(2), 304–314.

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Mindful Engineer
Mindful Engineer

Written by Mindful Engineer

Professional Engineer and Academic sharing self-improvement, productivity, and human behavior insights. Follow my journey and research insights from my pursuits

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